The Metrics of Friendship
by milesmorales
Summary: Ruby runs into Penny in the city and learns something that will test their friendship.


Ruby Rose shielded her eyes from the glare of the midday sun and stared at the map in her hands, her face scrunched up in concentration. She'd spent over a semester at Beacon, but the city of Vale still turned her around from time to time. It was easy to navigate the marked city streets compared to the rolling hills and forests of Patch, but the sheer size was intimidating. The whole island she grew up on could fit in the commercial district several times over. This neighborhood alone was the size of her home settlement.

"Nutterbutters," she grumbled under her breath before raising an eyebrow in consideration that her sister wasn't around.

"Fuck," she whispered gleefully, taking advantage of the opportunity to upgrade her language without the danger of a time out or getting her mouth washed out with-

"Salutations, friend Ruby!" shouted a voice behind her.

Ruby jumped a straight foot in the air, tried to spin to face the person behind her and wound up falling to the ground, knocking over a garbage can in the process.

"I said nutterbutters!" she screamed, flailing. "I said nutterbutters!"

"Ruby?" asked the now concerned voice. "Are you alright?"

Ruby looked up to see Penny standing over her. She was wearing a green sundress and a yellow cloche hat with her pink bow pinned to the side. A small pink purse hung by a thin strap from one shoulder and a nametag on her chest said "Hi, I'm Penny" in big, friendly letters.

"Yes!" Ruby said, trying to scramble to her feet. "I'm perfectly fine!" She put her hand on the trash can to push herself up, but it shifted and rolled from under her, clattering down the sidewalk and leaving her once again upon the ground.

She watched the trash can roll away out of sight and winced when she heard a crash and the sound of a car alarm going off. Penny watched, patient and motionless. She didn't even blink, which - if Ruby were being completely forthcoming - was more one of the girl's more unnerving habits.

"I could use a hand," Ruby sighed.

Penny brightened, offering her hand and letting Ruby grab on and pull herself up.

"Thanks," Ruby said, dusting herself off. "You surprised me, you're really sneaky."

"Thank you!" Penny beamed. "My shoes are specially designed to dampen sound and protect floors."

Ruby looked down at Penny's feet. She was wearing the same thick soled boots she always wore. They looked like an awkward complement to the rest of her outfit, but Penny seemed happy with them.

"Hardwoods are expensive," Penny explained sagely.

"Ah," said Ruby, reflecting on the drastic uptick in strange conversations she'd been a part of since meeting the robot girl. She shook her head clear. "Anyway, what are you up to? And why are you wearing this?" she asked, pointing to Penny's nametag.

"Oh!" Penny exclaimed. "I was just at an ice cream social."

"I didn't know you could..." Ruby searched for a delicate phrasing, but couldn't find one. "Eat," she finished.

"I cannot," said Penny simply.

Ruby rubbed her eyes in frustration and because they had begun to tear up in sympathy for the unblinking Penny.

"So why were you at an ice cream social?"

"It was an official function of the Atlas Expeditionary Force in conjunction with the Haywood Creamery." Penny looked off into the middle distance and spoke as if looking into a camera. "Haywood Creamery: cream in your mouth." Her eyes returned to Ruby. "And what have you been doing this lovely day?"

"Well," started Ruby, "I was talking with one of my friends, Pyrrha. Do you know Pyrrha?"

Penny cocked her head to the side in what Ruby was sure was an imitation of a thinking pose more than habit. "Pyrrha 'The Invincible Girl' Nikos, seventeen years old, 16-0 in the professional Mistral tournament circuit, weapon of choice is a spear and shield?"

"Yeah, that's her."

"No."

"...Do you know anyone named Pyrrha?"

"No."

Ruby sighed in frustration. "Then why didn't you just say you didn't know her?"

"I wanted to make sure I did not know the right person," Penny shrugged, still smiling.

Ruby sighed again, but instead of pursuing a conversation that would surely only lead to madness she pulled her map out again.

"Anyway, she told me about a Mistrali chocolate shop that uses chili peppers-"

"Oo, that sounds wonderful!"

"...Right, so I was trying to find it." Ruby shrugged helplessly. "No luck so far."

Penny's smile fell like a poorly hung picture frame. "That's terrible, Ruby. Do you know the address?"

"Olive Street, between Ravenhill and Maple," Ruby read off a notecard clipped to her map.

Penny tilted her head in thought again. "Turn right at the corner, travel to the first intersection and turn left. It should be on that block."

"Really?!" exclaimed Ruby, looking back to her map. "I've been looking for Olive Street for an hour!"

"The street changes names four times in the city," Penny explained. "It's only Olive Street on the other side of the bridge. Here the street is named Ox Road."

"Oh thank you Penny!" Ruby was all smiles again, the frustrations of the day washing off easily. "Do you want to come too?" she asked. "I mean, if you're not busy."

"It would be my pleasure, Ruby," Penny replied, falling into step beside her. The two walked in silence to the end of the block and Ruby couldn't help but feel awkward. If Penny felt awkward, she didn't show it. She simply walked, staring ahead with the same contented smile on her face, her strides matching Ruby's with unnerving precision.

"So..." said Ruby, drawing the word out. Penny turned her head and looked at Ruby expectantly, patiently waiting for the girl to continue. She was just not a lot of help today, Ruby thought.

At conversations, anyway.

Totally nailed those directions though.

"So," Ruby said again, more confident this time. "Why was the Atlas military holding an ice cream social?"

Penny's smile fled, leaving a blank expression behind.

"I do not think I can tell you that."

"Why?" laughed Ruby. "Is it classified?"

Penny said nothing but started looking more concerned.

"...Oh my god, it is classified."

"No," Penny said, looking downright fretful now. "Not exactly. It just doesn't work as well when people know about it."

Ruby's mind reeled. "What could the military possibly want classified about ice cream?"

Penny looked around before turning back to Ruby. "You have to promise not to tell anyone." Ruby nodded eagerly and Penny continued. "I am part of a experimental military project to test my ability to make people happy."

Ruby blinked.

And blinked again.

She shook her head to try and clear it, but that did absolutely nothing.

"What in the world does that even _mean_?" she asked.

"Well," Penny said, "as you know the creatures of Grimm are attracted to strong negative emotions like fear, hate, and sadness, with a particular draw towards emotions under the fear subgroup. This was long suspected, but finally proven scientifically approximately one century ago by Atlas researchers. They provided surveys asking them to rate their levels of happiness over the course of a year and correlated the data to show that areas with lower levels of happiness experienced a higher number of Grimm attacks."

"I didn't know that's how they found it out."

Penny shook her head, lips pressed tight.

"Father says people care more that things _are_ discovered than _how_ or _who_ ," Penny said in a low, bitter tone. "He says people cannot be expected to remember everything."

Ruby looked at her feet, not knowing what to say. Penny muttered a half audible apology and looked as miserable as Ruby felt. The two walked in silence until Ruby finally found some way to answer.

"I'm sure your father is happy you remember."

Penny looked up and smiled softly at Ruby, whispering a quiet thank you. Ruby took the robot's hand in hers and gave it a squeeze, giggling as Penny blushed.

"As I was saying," Penny said quickly. "The surveys were canceled almost as soon as the findings were published."

"Why was that," asked Ruby, furrowing her brow.

"Political concerns arose prior to the Great War and the war itself was traumatic enough to render any results gathered meaningless for statistical purposes. The surveys themselves were also traumatic."

"What? How?"

"They could predict where Grimm would attack. Upon finding out a region was approaching the danger zone for an attack, fear would take hold and make an attack inevitable. Simply filling out a form was causing people to worry, bringing down the mood across the entire kingdom."

"Oh," said Ruby, "that makes sense. Too bad it didn't-"

"The project was restarted in secret thirty years ago," Penny interrupted.

"...How do you survey people in secret?"

"Online surveys posted in magazines, mostly." Penny shrugged nonchalantly and Ruby wondered briefly if the gesture was entirely for her benefit. "Women's magazines specifically. Primarily they just compile data on relationship satisfaction, and they're horribly inaccurate, but they're consistently inaccurate and complement a wider effort of data collection."

"Wider effort?" Ruby asked, thinking of Weiss' weekly mail delivery from Atlas and the pile of magazines under the heiress' bed she swore she only bought for the cosmetic tips.

"It starts with collecting basic data. Employment, income (especially changes in income), property ownership, family size..."

"Oh, like having kids makes people happier," Ruby said, nodding.

"No," Penny said, shaking her head. "Not in the short run, anyway. Babies cause a substantial drop in disposable income, ruin sleep cycles, and have detrimental effects for careers. While it does eventually result in a net gain of happiness, there's an average of a three percent drop over the first five years. That was the driving force behind the drastic increase in Atlas maternal and paternal support." Her voice took on a note of pride. "Over the last decade the happiness reduction from babies has been dropped to only two percent in the kingdom!"

Ruby just frowned.

"I like babies," she muttered.

"I have not had one yet," replied Penny with a shrug.

Ruby decided to let that go.

The two stopped at the corner and waited for the light to change so they could cross. On the adjacent corner a convenience store advertised a window full of soap and shampoos, snacks, the dollar lottery, and a walk in pharmacy. Penny pointed to it as the two crossed the street.

"That is another useful indicator," she said.

"Uh," said Ruby, trying to figure out what exactly Penny was talking about. "Schneekers bars?"

"No," Penny giggled. "Soap. Shampoo. The sale of hygiene products is closely related to how outgoing a population is. Higher sales indicate a more social, happier citizenry."

"Atlas spies on what people buy?" Ruby asked, frowning.

"They just keep track of trends," Penny said, ignoring Ruby's incredulous look. "It has become a lot easier with the decline of physical currency and the rise of electronic transactions. Of course some goods are more indicative of moods than others, and some are highly contextual. Gym clothes show an increased desire to go out during the summer months, but dissatisfaction with one's body type in the winter." Penny angled her head to the side. "I suppose the cameras could be considered spying," she said.

"Cameras?"

"Surveillance cameras," Penny explained. "They have a lot of uses, but in this context they have a program to count the number of smiling people in crowds. It allows the authorities to have a rough estimate of an area's mood." She turned back to Ruby, noticing her frown for the first time. "Is something the matter?"

"It's just... It's just creepy," explained Ruby. "Being watched all the time? Having someone know whenever you buy a candybar? How do people do it?"

Penny shrugged. "Most people are unaware. That is for the best though, it doesn't work as well when people know about it."

Ruby stopped in her tracks.

"What did you say?"

Penny looked confused. "It doesn't work as well when people know about it," she repeated.

Ruby shook her head in disbelief.

"And what do you do in Atlas when people start getting upset?"

Penny hesitated, looking worried. "We do a variety of things. Ad campaigns, military displays, sponsored social activities..."

"Like ice cream socials?" It was more of an accusation than a question. "You're spying on _us_!"

"Ruby, please lower your voice," Penny said, looking around them. "You promised you would not tell anyone."

"Atlas is spying on us, Penny. That's _not_ okay!"

"Please," begged Penny, clasping her hands in front of her. "You are going to get me in trouble, we are just trying to help you."

Ruby shook her head and started to back away. Penny followed after, but Ruby turned and started walking and then running, faster and faster until she disappeared in a flutter of rose petals. Behind her Penny chased after, yelling for her to stop before finally giving up and coming to a stop in front of a chocolatier's store. She stood there motionless for a long time until a town car stopped in the street next to her and a pair of soldiers kindly ushered her inside.


End file.
